Spookily bad stuff...

Spooked: The Ghosts of Waverly Hills Sanatorium
This review is dedicated to my father, who never once said to me that skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, but who lives that concept every day.

Okay, so, there's this haunted Tuberculosis Sanatorium in Louisville, Ky. You may have heard of it before, since it has been explored by everyone from the people who make Most Haunted to Gary Busey (don't ask). So, what was once my favorite high school freak-out tale has become an international ghost hunting Mecca. I don't mind, really. Especially since the current owners are awesome people who are doing everything that they can to make sure that the grounds and the building stay open to the public.

Th problem is the quality of people that international ghost hunting Meccas attract. See, we had this jackass film maker named Christopher Saint Booth traipse into town to make a horror movie called Death Tunnel, which was filmed on sight at Waverly Hills. Apparently, to help promote the film, which has had questionable success, the same fellow has made a documentary about the paranormal events at Waverly. Before I go on, ole Chris is kind of like Ed Wood but without the charm or sartorial style -- his scruffy hair, dumb silver jewelry and bad hat choices are evidence.

Evidence:


This documentary is called Spooked, and amazingly enough, Frank and I discovered a copy of this gem at Video Ezy here in Nowra. It was a must-rent, not only due to the subject matter (now that I don't live in Louisville any more, I'll watch pretty much anything about Kentucky), but because of the stylish and dignified name of the aforementioned film.

I am sad to report that every single thing that I feared to find in this documentary was found, and then some. First, it wins the Amityville Horror award for internal inconsistencies. Facts are provided to the viewer in white text on a black background at the very start of the film. Almost every single one of those facts are contradicted by the statements made by interview subjects within the following fifteen minutes. It's not necessarily a bad thing that the initial facts are contradicted, because most of them are incorrect, but one has to wonder exactly why the initial facts that are presented were not corrected after obtaining information from interview subjects.

One of the primary interview subjects is sadly, Keith Age, who is the founder of the Louisville Ghost Hunters Society. You get to witness this fellow in his best good-fellah-from-the-holler, yee-haw-ain't-we-havin'-a-time best, as he leads a film crew though the beautiful and sadly run-down sanatorium. You also get to watch him trot out his usual repertoire that he provides to all tour attendees, which include stores about and EVP meter "melting" in one of the treatment rooms and about how ghosts seem to like to throw chunks of cement at him. I'm on the side of the ghosts in this instance, because if Mr. Age came traipsing through my house on a regular basis, waving cheap electronic gizmos and shining laser pointers around, I'd probably throw concrete at him, too.

By now, you may have guessed that I don't care much for Mr. Age. And you'd be correct. I've heard far too many stories about this guy and his cheap but uninspired showmanship to believe a word that comes out of his mouth. He's the type of paranormal researcher who likes to stand in the back of a crowd, stumble into people in front of him, and exclaim that he's just been hit in the back by a rock which was thrown by a mean old ghostie. And, though he claims that he is a skeptic at heart, who is desperately seeking confirmation that the paranormal exists, he'll blithely point at really bad "orb" photos, and insist that they are evidence of the paranormal.

I was afraid that "orb" photos were going to put in an appearance, and I wasn't disappointed. Plenty of them are trotted out in the course of the documentary, along with grainy close-ups up "faces" in the orbs. Not once does the documentary mention the questionable nature of "orb" ghost photos, nor are the viewers provided with information about the weather conditions under which the photos were taken. Other photos are show the the viewer, ranging from images of strange human torsos and faces to misty "ectoplasm" shots, some of which are so obviously cigarette smoke, that I ended up feeling embarrassed for the film makers.

Some of the other interviews were mildly entertaining, especially the ones with two ex-patients of the sanatorium. Hearing about their experiences with Tuberculosis (repeatedly called the "White Plague" in the film), was interesting. They firmly express how good the care they received at Waverly was, despite the sensationalism of the film makers, who repeatedly attempt to intimate that there was something nefarious going on while the building was operated as a Tuberculosis Sanatorium. (They were barking up the wrong tree, abysmal care of patients didn't figure into the building's history until it was reopened as a Nursing Home years later.) There are questionable moments in the editing, in which it appears that certain interview subjects are backing each other up about stories that are patently false. Careful watching allows you to identify these moments fairly easily.

In conclusion, watch Spooked for a piece of Louisville folklore history, because all of the old stories are told, including everything from the nurse who hung herself on the fifth floor in the infamous room 502, to the ghost of a little girl named Mary who haunts the floor below. Or, watch it for the images of Waverly, which are hauntingly beautiful in their desolation. Or even watch it to make fun of Christopher Saint Booth's fashion sense. But don't watch in the hopes of seeing a detailed and well-documented documentary about the paranormal events that are reported to have taken place there, because you certainly won't find that here.

Oh, and Happy Christmas/Happy Hanukkah/Happy Yule/Happy Kwanzaa/Happy Holidays, ya'll -- and have a happy New Year, too!

Much love,
Connie

PS: Yeah, I know it was short and not quite as vicious as usual -- but Ms. Connie has been busy doing holiday things and getting engaged and stuff, so deal with it!

5 Weird Reasons Why I Love Louisville

1. Pope Lick Goat Man:

There’s a train trestle that runs over several roads that are fairly close to my parents’ house. And there is a goat man that haunts that bridge! Legend has it that a fearsome half-man, half-goat creature haunts this lonely trestle that arches ominously over Pope Lick Road. (Before you think that we Kentuckians use street names as religious commentary, a “lick” refers to a natural deposit of salt that animals like to come…well, lick.) There are many origin stories for this wretched creature, my favorite is that the goat man was a circus performer and his own circus train ran over him one dark creepy night, decapitating him in the process. He replaced his lost head with that of a goat, and there you have it – goat man! (This version of the legend doesn’t even appear in the Wikipedia entry, which you can check out here.)

The sad part of this story is that teenage boys, high on hormones and adrenaline, occasionally try to walk across this trestle and often get hit by trains – go figure. Never underestimate the stupidity of teenage boys.

For your edification, you can watch an independent movie about the trestle and the goat man, if you can find a copy. It's called The Legend of the Pope Lick Monster, and if you live in the 'Ville, you can rent a copy at Wild and Wooly video.

For your further edification, you can check out this picture of the Goat Man by Jeffrey Scott Holland. I think it's the creepiest, and therefore the best.

2. Potential Satanist Church:

In high school (particularly Catholic High School), there's nothing like the story of a Satanic Church hidden in the back waters of a suburb on the fringe of the Metro area to make you want to...jump in a car and go looking for it. Turns out, it was supposedly right near the Pope Lick Trestle, where the Goat Man roamed. So, we would pile into the car and take off into the night to look for it. All we ever found was a bunch of satanism-themed graffiti (probably done by other bored teenagers that couldn't find this church). Now that I look back on it, I wonder what we thought were were going to find? A little white board church with an upside down cross on top and a changeable-type sign out front that said "First Union Satanist Church - Newcomers Scarified Daily"?

3. Waverly Hills Sanatorium:

This one is the biggie, the one that nearly everyone has heard about. And it is supposedly the most haunted site in the country/the world (take your pick.) It probably is the most haunted site in Kentucky, and probably the region (but not the creepiest, I'm saving that for last).

Waverly started out as a tuberculosis sanatorium, and was hugely expanded during the tuberculosis epidemics that swept through Kentucky 1920's. It's history (along with the sheer number of deaths that took place during the height of the epidemic -- some people say 1 death an hour) and it's subsequent conversion into a nursing home in which the residents were often neglected and mistreated makes for ripe haunting grounds.

And haunted it is. There are the ghostly children that play outside on the grounds. There's the eerily haunted Room 502, which contain the ghosts of two suicides. There are the eerie black shadow people that populate the upper floors. There's the ghostly kid I saw peering out a window of the third floor. There's the glowing old lady in a wheel chair I saw on the 4the floor. And those are just a few of the ghostly creatures meant to inhabit this place.

Waverly has appeared on more "hauntings" TV shows than you can shake a stick at.

I've visited many times and taken rolls and rolls of pictures. (You can get guided tours through the place). I'll post some pictures in the future. The building is in terrible disrepair due to previous owners who wanted to get it condemned so they could knock it down. The current owners are slowly refurbishing it, bit by bit.

A horror movie has been made which used Waverly as a set. It's called Death Tunnel, but I've not seen it yet -- I bet you could pick up a copy at Wild and Wooly Video.

However, a local writer (and old friend of mine) produced a War of the Worlds-type radio play called Live At Waverly Hills, which I thoroughly enjoyed (probably because I performed in it.)

4. Fatal 48

This is fire call box number 48, which was located at 6th and Main street in downtown Louisville, and the site of many many fatal fires (statistcally more than there should be at one call box).

5. Eastern Cemetery

It's a little cemetery on Baxter Avenue here in Louisville that was started in 1843. By 1858, graves were already being reused. Yeah, you read that right -- reused. Whole sections have been renamed, resold, and reburied multiple times throughout the cemetery's history.

This is, by far, one of the creepiest places in town, despite the fact that cemeteries usually are not home to a lot of haunting phenomena. It's also home to the coolest grave stone I've ever seen.

The sad part of this story is that due to repeated mismanagement by various management companies, the cemetery is largely uncared for -- except for the efforts of locals and those who have family buried there. The chapel and columbarium at the back of the cemetery is now home for gangs and homeless people regularly camp out on the grounds.

*blink blink* Where am I?

I'm back in my old stomping grounds for the next month or so, that's where! Connie is visiting friends and family in Kentucky. So, my posts will be erratic, if best. For those of you in the back, muttering about my posts always being erratic, you can just shut the hell up.

You may be wondering what is on my agenda as I traipse around Kentucky. Well, my schedule is a doozy. Here's what I hope to accomplish:

1. One or more visits to Eastern Cemetery in Louisville, KY. It's one of my favorite spots in town and *very* haunted. To add to the usual weirdness factor, my Mother may be interested in going with me.

2. A visit to Waverly Hills Sanitorium, the most haunted site in the state (some people say the World, but hello -- Glamis Castle, anyone?) Mom has also expressed interest in this excursion, but she's thinks she won't come. Actually, this may be impossible, as they appear booked for the rest of the year. And have suffered an attack of organization and restructuring of tours, to boot! I may throw myself on their mercy and give them a call, and beg, but it looks doubtful. They have done a fantastic job restoring the place, though, so I'd love to contribute some cash to the cause.

4. Any other trouble of an occult/paranormal bent that I can get into.

As for now, I am off to bed!